Open hands and empty mind

There are times when you write aimlessly. Just to write. May be, it's a way to express what you feel when you do not have a company to share. Today is one such day.

When I think of my stay in village, my life is peaceful but empty. It is full of moments but not memories. I have crowd around me but not people. I am happy but not joyful. I can speak but not say.

May be I am not used to taking a backseat while driving my life. But is it all about that?

I am currently all about the days when I keep pondering of burning my midnight oil to achieve dreams, and living it, which leave me frustrated for not being in present. And those days when all I think about is my project for which I have come and spend days laughing, reading and hogging on good food because life set hai boss.

This seems to be a perpetual aura created by my mind to kill the boredom and keep myself occupied with neverending thoughts, or may be a part of enlightment from reading George Orwell books, who knows.

All I feel is like a kid watching sunshine falling in a dark room through a minute space with kid wondering why does the sun even shine!

Beauty of Life

Ever wondered why life is so unpredictable? I do. I unfortunately have this bad habit of contemplating all the time. There have been several mornings when I wake up and ask myself what is the purpose today. Why am I still living to see today's sunrise. What have I done to make my presence felt on this planet. I feel to some questions, I may never find an answer but what if I do. What if I find what I actually want in life. A hobby or passion or work or study or travel that actually makes me happy.

Ask me to define happiness and I will answer with phrases and words that exist in my vocabulary. But is that so limited? They say be happy and be free like a bird, but am I? Can I just catch a flight and move to London to spend few weeks just because I wish so. No! Instead I will slog and follow the mundane whether I like it or not. And for whom? For earning money that may or may not give me happiness but surely some comfort which is enough to show the society that I live a happy life.

But, do I really care?

It was recently that I thought of not caring about the society for once. I wanted to take a leap of faith. I wanted to jump into emptiness and see what I can make of it. I wanted to be a free bird in literal sense and hold the string of my life, myself. And thats what I did.

I am writing this from a village in Karnataka. I have left my clinics and patients behind to live rural life for a year. I am the boss of my life. Away from family and friends, I have chosen to stay amongst strangers and make them a part of my life. Ask me if am happy, and I will say, I just dont know how to express it. This sense of freedom is new and still to be explored and all I have to say is,

Yes, life is unpredictable, because we make it unpredictable :)

Morning at Nubra

15th June'16

It was 6:30am. I woke up with the chirping of morning birds in the forest. I was laying on bed in a tent. Sun rays were yet to spread their warmth at Nubra valley, a geographically unique terrain located at 10,000 ft above sea level. The weather was too cold for a tropical person like me. 

I woke up from my bed, covered with four layers of clothing to step outside the tent. The view was breathtaking. Lush green grasses covered with morning dew, sparkling on the ground. The golden sun rays seen falling on top of mountain tips. The watercolor blue sky spread like a blanket over the massive valley. And a wood fire smoke seen at a distance from our breakfast being prepared. The calmness was addictive. Away from the cacophony of metro life, morning like this was bringing me closer to myself. 

Being the typical chai person that I am, I wished I was served with a hot cup of tea while I sit surrounded by 20 white tents. Occasional cold breezes were soothing and indulging.Random thoughts flowed through my mind as time passed. My journey at every point made me realise how tiny we were in front of mother nature. Natural beauty especially in himalayas can leave you with life long memories. The journey affects you spiritually, no wonder why the Dalai Lama has chosen the himalayas as his place to rest.  

Later my wish did get fulfilled. I was served with masala chai and hot Puri bhaji for breakfast. Hot and sumptous breakfast filled me with enthusiam to look forward for the adventurous day ahead.